Spring Break
Dominating fantasy, sexual urges
Kathy Greaves
Issue date: 5/21/08 Section: Forum
Now, to answer your first and most important question: how do you broach this subject with your boyfriend?
It sounds like you already have good communication with your boyfriend if you've discussed and participated in light bondage. That's a great start. Bringing up sadomasochistic acts could be as easy as, "Hey baby, wanna whip me?"
If that seems too difficult, I'd suggest taking him to an adult store and showing him your interest in some basic masochistic paraphernalia like a whip or nipple clamps. His reaction will make it clear to you whether he's interested in those items and that type of sex play.
Dear Dr. Sex,
I am a 21-year-old male here at OSU. Lately (like the last six months) my sex drive has been in overdrive. When I was around 13 I would masturbate constantly, easily once or more a day, but as time went on that number dropped considerably, as expected.
By freshman and sophomore years of college I could easily go a week or two between sexual release if need be. But as I said, in the past six months the desire to masturbate has reached the levels it was during puberty; if I had the time I could easily orgasm twice or more a day. Is it usual for men to have such an uptick in their sex drive at this age and at such a strong urge?
-Am I Normal?
Dear Am I Normal,
It is actually very normal. If we look at the sexual desire of men aged 18 to 64, we find that sexual desire continually rises until it reaches its peak between the ages of 25 and 29 years. From that point on, it drops gradually.
For those who are curious about the sexual desire of women (I'm sure it's most of you reading this), that looks a bit different, but probably not what you expected.
Women actually have two peaks. The first peak comes between the ages of 22 and 24 (before men peak).
Then between the ages of 25 and 29 (when men are peaking), women's sexual desire goes down.
It is theorized that this drop is due to the demands of childbirth and the raising of infants and toddlers, a common experience for women in this age group.
It sounds like you already have good communication with your boyfriend if you've discussed and participated in light bondage. That's a great start. Bringing up sadomasochistic acts could be as easy as, "Hey baby, wanna whip me?"
If that seems too difficult, I'd suggest taking him to an adult store and showing him your interest in some basic masochistic paraphernalia like a whip or nipple clamps. His reaction will make it clear to you whether he's interested in those items and that type of sex play.
Dear Dr. Sex,
I am a 21-year-old male here at OSU. Lately (like the last six months) my sex drive has been in overdrive. When I was around 13 I would masturbate constantly, easily once or more a day, but as time went on that number dropped considerably, as expected.
By freshman and sophomore years of college I could easily go a week or two between sexual release if need be. But as I said, in the past six months the desire to masturbate has reached the levels it was during puberty; if I had the time I could easily orgasm twice or more a day. Is it usual for men to have such an uptick in their sex drive at this age and at such a strong urge?
-Am I Normal?
Dear Am I Normal,
It is actually very normal. If we look at the sexual desire of men aged 18 to 64, we find that sexual desire continually rises until it reaches its peak between the ages of 25 and 29 years. From that point on, it drops gradually.
For those who are curious about the sexual desire of women (I'm sure it's most of you reading this), that looks a bit different, but probably not what you expected.
Women actually have two peaks. The first peak comes between the ages of 22 and 24 (before men peak).
Then between the ages of 25 and 29 (when men are peaking), women's sexual desire goes down.
It is theorized that this drop is due to the demands of childbirth and the raising of infants and toddlers, a common experience for women in this age group.
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