Spring Break
Best, worst of Halloween candy
Diversions' cavity-free candy expert focuses on the world of sugar-filled creations
Rick Crawford
Issue date: 10/23/09 Section: Diversions
Halloween is only a week away and the debate that rages in our country once a year will once again continue.
No, I'm not talking about which outfit will show the most cleavage between the witch and the hooker, which is a viable concern. This debate is much more important. I'm talking of course about Halloween candy.
We may be in college now, but we still love eating ridiculous amounts of candy each year. But which is the best? There are dozens upon dozens of amazing candies that one will consume over the weekend, so it is important to categorize the best ones.
Our first topic is the sugary stuff.
While it is true that all the different types of candy I will mention have sugar in them, the ones in this category are made of just pure sugar.
First is Sweet Tarts, which are always delicious and fun to see in your Halloween bag. The problem with Sweet Tarts, however, is that the package only contains three and most of the time they're two grape. And that sucks.
Pixy Stixs are also fun to have during Halloween, except for when they get EVERYWHERE! Or when the stupid kid next you in class thinks they're funny to snort.
Really?
But neither of these options are the best pure-sugar choice. That award goes to the one and only Smarties. These things are perfect. There are multiple pieces in each package, whenever someone is handing them out you get, like, twelve, and they help if you're having any heartburn.
When it comes to chocolates, it's almost like you can't lose as long as the people handing them out stick to the brand names. Can you really have a bad time eating miniature Snickers, Twix, Milky Way, Three Musketeers, M&M's and KitKat, along with others? I say nay, unless you're handed an Almond Joy. Do people even like those? I mean, seriously, what are you supposed to do with them? Feeding them to the dog is a solid solution.
There are some other good nominees for the best Halloween candy that I have not mentioned yet. The little packages of Twizzlers, the chocolate candies made especially for Halloween that you can buy for bulk, Skittles, only the normal kind of Tootsie Rolls and Dum Dums. All of these are phenomenal and something we do not eat enough.
No, I'm not talking about which outfit will show the most cleavage between the witch and the hooker, which is a viable concern. This debate is much more important. I'm talking of course about Halloween candy.
We may be in college now, but we still love eating ridiculous amounts of candy each year. But which is the best? There are dozens upon dozens of amazing candies that one will consume over the weekend, so it is important to categorize the best ones.
Our first topic is the sugary stuff.
While it is true that all the different types of candy I will mention have sugar in them, the ones in this category are made of just pure sugar.
First is Sweet Tarts, which are always delicious and fun to see in your Halloween bag. The problem with Sweet Tarts, however, is that the package only contains three and most of the time they're two grape. And that sucks.
Pixy Stixs are also fun to have during Halloween, except for when they get EVERYWHERE! Or when the stupid kid next you in class thinks they're funny to snort.
Really?
But neither of these options are the best pure-sugar choice. That award goes to the one and only Smarties. These things are perfect. There are multiple pieces in each package, whenever someone is handing them out you get, like, twelve, and they help if you're having any heartburn.
When it comes to chocolates, it's almost like you can't lose as long as the people handing them out stick to the brand names. Can you really have a bad time eating miniature Snickers, Twix, Milky Way, Three Musketeers, M&M's and KitKat, along with others? I say nay, unless you're handed an Almond Joy. Do people even like those? I mean, seriously, what are you supposed to do with them? Feeding them to the dog is a solid solution.
There are some other good nominees for the best Halloween candy that I have not mentioned yet. The little packages of Twizzlers, the chocolate candies made especially for Halloween that you can buy for bulk, Skittles, only the normal kind of Tootsie Rolls and Dum Dums. All of these are phenomenal and something we do not eat enough.
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Viewing Comments 1 - 1 of 1
S
posted 10/22/09 @ 11:42 PM PST
Actually, Rick, it is not a good idea to feed Almond Joy to the dog. Chocolate is poisonous to dogs and can be fatal.
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