Spring Break
Advice on taking a chance and keeping oneself clean
Kathy Greaves Ph.D.
Issue date: 11/4/09 Section: Forum
Dear Dr. Sex,
I have a friend who sometimes seems like she is flirting with me but sometimes doesn't, and it's been seriously confusing me. I definitely like her, but I also don't want to mess up our friendship if she isn't actually interested. What's a good way to figure out what's really going on?
Signed, She Loves Me,
She Loves Me Not
Dear She Loves Me,
That's a tough question and an age-old one as well. I am a firm believer in two things: 1. Honesty is the best policy. 2. Never have regrets. Focusing on belief #1 - I think you just need to ask her if she's interested in dating you or having a relationship with you that is more than just friends. If she isn't, I doubt it will mess up the friendship. What it might do is make things awkward for a bit, but then they should go back to normal.
Typically what messes up a friendship is moving a relationship beyond friendship and then having that arrangement not work out. In that situation, it can just be really hard to go back to being friends. Some people are good at that, some aren't.
In terms of never having regrets, I think it's important to take advantage of every opportunity that presents itself. That way you'll never look back and say to yourself, "Wow, I wish I would have asked her if she liked me 'like that.'' Additionally, if you had things to do over and you did them differently, you wouldn't be the person you are today.
I can say with all honesty I've done some questionable things in my life (last Tuesday's class is a great example). However, if I hadn't done them, I wouldn't be me and, well, I'm pretty happy with who I am these days. While it has been a long and wild ride, it's a ride I wouldn't trade for anything.
Dear Dr. Sex,
How does a transsexual female keep her fake vagina clean? I remember when I took your human sexuality class you talked about how the vagina is a self-cleaning structure because of the natural daily secretions. So without those daily secretions how does the transsexual keep her fake vagina clean?
I have a friend who sometimes seems like she is flirting with me but sometimes doesn't, and it's been seriously confusing me. I definitely like her, but I also don't want to mess up our friendship if she isn't actually interested. What's a good way to figure out what's really going on?
Signed, She Loves Me,
She Loves Me Not
Dear She Loves Me,
That's a tough question and an age-old one as well. I am a firm believer in two things: 1. Honesty is the best policy. 2. Never have regrets. Focusing on belief #1 - I think you just need to ask her if she's interested in dating you or having a relationship with you that is more than just friends. If she isn't, I doubt it will mess up the friendship. What it might do is make things awkward for a bit, but then they should go back to normal.
Typically what messes up a friendship is moving a relationship beyond friendship and then having that arrangement not work out. In that situation, it can just be really hard to go back to being friends. Some people are good at that, some aren't.
In terms of never having regrets, I think it's important to take advantage of every opportunity that presents itself. That way you'll never look back and say to yourself, "Wow, I wish I would have asked her if she liked me 'like that.'' Additionally, if you had things to do over and you did them differently, you wouldn't be the person you are today.
I can say with all honesty I've done some questionable things in my life (last Tuesday's class is a great example). However, if I hadn't done them, I wouldn't be me and, well, I'm pretty happy with who I am these days. While it has been a long and wild ride, it's a ride I wouldn't trade for anything.
Dear Dr. Sex,
How does a transsexual female keep her fake vagina clean? I remember when I took your human sexuality class you talked about how the vagina is a self-cleaning structure because of the natural daily secretions. So without those daily secretions how does the transsexual keep her fake vagina clean?
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